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TRUST IS…
If you are reading this then I know that you are probably involved as a family member or friend in providing support to a loved one who has been diagnosed with ARDS (Advanced Respiratory Distress Syndrome). TRUST is something you are going to need to have to get through the weeks that lie ahead, as well as the ability to "lighten up" from time to time to bring more normal feelings back into your life. So I offer you this little story that is all about TRUST and what it looked like to me one cold winter's day.
At exactly this time of year in 1996 I was away on a trip that went to Vancouver, the Rockies, Northern Ontario and Montreal. It was a tiring trip during which I did not obtain too much rest other than at night in my hotel room, waiting in airport departure lounges and also the odd hours light sleep snatched during one of my many flights from here to there. There were several points of tension during those 6 days.... like a lonely 5 hour drive across high Rocky Mountain passes during snowstorms and whiteouts.... not an experience to be recommended.
But the one that really got my stomach churning took place at a small airport in Northern Canada from which I had flown many times. It started out as just another day. As usual for this time of year it was very cold, with snow already accumulating, so I was glad, after the short walk from the terminal building, to climb on board the aircraft. "For goodness sake shut the door," I mentally chided the steward. I was hoping that the temperature inside the plane, without the freezing wind-chill courtesy of the rear door, would quickly warm up to at least zero or better.
Eventually, door closed, we roared down the runway and took off for Winnipeg, 2 hours to the south. Immediately we were airborne the pilot cut the power right back, (not recommended) leveled off at 500 feet and made several steep turns both to the left and right. The passenger across the aisle from me was heard to say: "This is not a good sign!" I thought to myself at the time "You, my unknown friend, have just made the understatement of the year...."
Just when we reached a point that I thought must lead us back to an emergency landing, the power was increased and we slowly started to climb. A few minutes later I managed to speak with the steward whom I had mentally berated earlier, and said to him...
"What's going on?" I could have climbed out of that airport faster on a warm day in a Cessna 172 than we just did..." he quipped... Yes, you could have done it fully loaded as well... followed by..."the co-pilot's parents have just purchased a cottage in the area and we did a little sightseeing tour of it before setting course for our destination. Did you notice the nice cottage on the left with all the logs in the yard...."
Sounds far fetched…TRUST me, it happened just as I have written.
If our situation had been a real emergency then all we as passengers could do would have been to place our TRUST in those who were in command... hoping that their training and experience would bring us through a difficult situation.
Sometimes as we all know, there are events that happen to us which take away the control we appear to exercise over our lives. Bad stuff does happen in this world of wonder and excitement, not always just to others... it sometimes touches our lives as well.
When that happens we need to re-group our thoughts and actions, so here are three action ideas for you.
Understanding the ARDS prognosis is important as you learn what might be expected in the weeks ahead. The ARDS Foundation can help you with this. Equally important is showing TRUST in your loved one's health team as they seek to provide the outcome that everyone has been praying for. Tell them you appreciate their work and dedication.
Finally, offer prayers for comfort, strength and healing. They are so important at this time, especially if your loved one cannot respond to you due to their life support apparatus. Prayer helps us to understand and accept the outcome of ARDS. If you do not have any spiritual connections, seek out the chaplain of the hospital and talk to her/him about your feelings. They are there to help you in this situation.
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